1644
date: 2014-07-06 
time: 16:44:35
time: 16:44:35it took me a while to learn
not to build a home in a person
i wanted their fingers laced together like bricks
i wanted their eyes to be windows
that i could peer out of and admire the view
i wanted their legs to be my stilts
and their mouth to be my front porch
i wanted a place to sit on sunday mornings
i wanted the comforts of their ribcage
to wrap around me like the blankets of my childhood bed
but people don't do that
they will not bend to your will
and take in tenants they don't have room for
it's okay.
lay your own bricks
put drapes up in your eyes and draw them back when the sun rises
wrap yourself in your skin
and breathe in the familiar homey smell
of your heart pumping blood like fresh apple pies.
poetry /
/ 0 comments
1638
date: 2014-07-06 time: 16:38:41
time: 16:38:41you were my go to
"it's three am and i'm lonely
are you still awake?"
my "have you heard this"
"have you seen this"
"have you done this"
my questions answered
without a second thought
you were mine
i miss you
poetry /
/ 0 comments
2033
date: 2014-07-02 time: 20:33:51
time: 20:33:51you smell like stale cigarette smoke and black coffee
like sleepless nights spent alone
and i'm tired
so tired
but your presence is like caffeine
.
you taste like chlorine
no matter how long it's been since your last swim
and i'm scared
terrified
of falling in love
.
it's two a.m.
i'm driving alone
and it's quiet
so quiet
but thinking of you keeps me safe
poetry /
/ 0 comments
0508
date: 2014-06-30 time: 05:08:48
time: 05:08:48A supernova is a star that burns so bright it causes an explosion
You are a supernova
So bright you are blinding
So warm you are sometimes cold
Catastrophic
You are impossible
You trace my freckles like they are constellations
The stars seem to shine from your face.
Newton's third law of motion states that
for every action there is an equal and opposite reaction
Your existence alone defies the laws of physics
You taught me more about the universe than Newton ever did
If you are ever alone
look up at the stars
find the north star
then the big dipper
realize these are the stars you have seen all your life
when it comes to the universe
you are always at home.
You are a person of the stars
Millions of stars exploded just so you can exist
their dust is in your bones.
poetry /
/ 0 comments
waiting
date: 2014-06-29 time: 00:53:45
time: 00:53:45there's a girl two towns over
and she's
painting pictures of his wrists
when she should be sleeping
because she would dream of them anyway
and she's
twisting bracelets around her arm
because she's thinking of him and
doesn't know what to do with her hands
and she's
carving his name into her ribcage
because he's the one promise
that hasn't fallen apart yet
poetry /
/ 0 comments
stars
date: 2014-06-29 time: 00:51:16
time: 00:51:16i wake up most nights
to the sound of my skin
screaming out your name
and i miss you more than i should
poetry /
/ 0 comments
here
date: 2014-06-29 time: 00:50:00
time: 00:50:00THERE WILL BE NO MIRACLES HERE:
my ribcage
cracked, splintered
too small, too full of hate for myself
to house love for anyone else
bend them 'till they break
SOMETHING BEAUTIFUL HAPPENED HERE:
your bedroom
dimly lit, and cold
cradling the bed
where you held me and said
that you loved me
the room overflowing with lies
I SPILLED MY HEART HERE:
the park bench
wood damp and rotting
our names carved into the seat
we'll never sit in again
too many memories of the time
when i asked you to stay
poetry /
/ 0 comments
hands
date: 2014-06-23 time: 20:06:14
time: 20:06:14when i'm laying in my bed at night
trying to remember how it felt to touch your skin
you're letting her write her name on your neck
with her teeth
and i still love you
poetry /
/ 0 comments
leave (5)
date: 2014-06-23 time: 20:03:40
time: 20:03:40keep saying his name
until you can hear it without flinching
say it like you didn't scream it
while he was breaking your heart
in back alleys
while he was breaking you open
in cold bedrooms
learn to forget him
poetry /
/ 0 comments
leave (4)
date: 2014-06-23 time: 20:01:42
time: 20:01:42go to the nearest pool
and sink to the bottom
and don't come out until you've counted to 100
when you surface
feel the weight rise off of your chest
and realize it's easier to breathe
without his body over yours
poetry /
/ 0 comments
leave (3)
date: 2014-06-03 time: 23:25:37
time: 23:25:37write his name on your skin
and write it again
and write it again
until it looks foreign
roll it over your tongue
until it no longer tastes like sea salt and honey
roll it over your tongue
until it doesn't mean anything to you anymore
poetry /
/ 0 comments
leave (2)
date: 2014-05-28 time: 16:05:56
time: 16:05:56get in the shower
and put the water on the highest temperature you can handle
burn off every piece of flesh he ever touched
remind yourself that the new skin you stand in
belongs to you and no one else
not him
poetry /
/ 0 comments
0005
date: 2014-05-26 time: 00:05:09
time: 00:05:09i am not in love with you
but sometimes i wish i was
because maybe then i would understand
why when i think of saying goodbye to you
my stomach drops
because when you talk about leaving
when i remember that i will not see you for two years
my knees buckle
i do not know what love feels like
but i know that i am not in love with you
because we can talk about our favorite bands
but we cannot talk about our pasts
still
when i know that for two years
and maybe many years after
i will not hear your voice
i will not know what it's like to feel safe in your arms
my legs begin to shake
poetry /
/ 0 comments
leave
date: 2014-05-26 time: 00:00:31
time: 00:00:31steal the abandoned parts of yourself back
from the calloused hands of the boy
who didn't know the value of your bottom lip
over your left collarbone
reassemble yourself piece by piece
until you're something he's never seen before
poetry /
/ 0 comments
tread lightly
date: 2014-05-25 time: 20:10:57
time: 20:10:57it feels like a hurricane
blazed a trail through my body
it feels like every time i breathe
i exhale through the hole you punched
through the middle of my chest
i cried for you once
and now i can't stop
you took so much more from me than you needed
poetry /
/ 0 comments
poison
date: 2014-05-24 time: 17:59:07
time: 17:59:07there were so many things
that i wanted to tell you
but my words have a habit
of dripping off my tongue
like arsenic
i never wanted to hurt you
so i kept them to myself
and let them poison me instead
poetry /
/ 0 comments
stuck
date: 2014-05-24 time: 02:07:02
time: 02:07:02i wish i didn't love you
i wish your fingers
weren't tangled in the knots in my hair
i wish my fingers
weren't tangled in your veins
it's gonna hurt like hell
when we're torn apart
poetry /
/ 0 comments
better
date: 2014-05-23 time: 19:50:03
time: 19:50:03i hope you kiss a girl
with lips so sweet
they make your teeth ache
and i hope she's more careful with your heart
than i ever was
i hope you never think of me
because you deserve so much more
than what i could give you
poetry /
/ 0 comments
1946
date: 2014-05-23 time: 19:46:10
time: 19:46:10i. This world is breaking my spine and I'm
not sure I can stand up for what I believe in anymore.
ii. I only had the courage to ignore your incoming
call because I felt your sadness through my ringtone.
iii. My heart has been beaten and bruised and
I've cut my jacket's sleeve so my heart won't have a home
there anymore.
iv. And I understand why it's the size of a fist,
it never learned to fight so it might as well beat itself
up while it can.
v. My fists aren't good for fighting, but with every
beat in my heart against my ribcage I can hear my bones
hum to the tune of life.
poetry /
/ 0 comments
1940
date: 2014-05-22 time: 19:40:15
time: 19:40:15when i taste salt i think of you.
i remember when we were in the sea and
you kissed me so hard i thought you were trying
to rearrange my ribs and tie my heart strings in knots.
i remember staying up late and eating popcorn and talking
about life and death and everything in between and you told me
that maybe life wasn't for you.
i remember tasting salt but this time it came from my eyes
and breathing hurt and i wondered
"was it like this for you?"
except it wasn't because
you can drown in the sea
but you can't drown in tears
poetry /
/ 0 comments
